Mothers to Music Anecdotes and Humor

MOTHERS

Thomas Edison’s tribute to his mother:
I did not have my mother long, but she cast over me a good influence that lasted all my life. The good effects of her early training I can never lose. If it had not been for her appreciation and her faith in me at a critical time in my experience, I would never likely have become an inventor. I was always a careless boy, and with a mother of different mental caliber, I would have turned out badly. But her firmness, her sweetness, her goodness, were potent powers to keep me on the right path. My mother was the making of me. The memory of her will always be a blessing to me.

M is for the million things she gave me;
O is only that she’s growing old;
T is for the tears she shed to save me;
H is for her heart of purest gold;
E is for her eyes with lovelight shining;
R is for right and right she’ll always be.
Put them all together, they spell “Mother,” the name that means all the world to me.

Because I Loved My Mother
When I was just a little child
I loved my mother so,
I liked to touch what she had touched,
And always tried to know
The things she loved the best of all,
So I could love them too.
I made a secret list of them,
Although she never knew.
And now, although I am grown, I love
My heavenly Father so,
That like a little child again

I humbly seek to know
The things which are the most dear to Him
So I may love them too.
And thus draw closer to the heart
Of the Lord my mother knew.

The newest development in manufacturing is robotics. Robots put in endless hours, function in different environments, never seem to run down, cost very little to maintain, and do it all without praise, personal attention, or stroking. Actually, robotics are nothing new. They used to be called mothers.

Behind every great man is his mother:
Mrs Morse: “Sam, stop tapping your fingers on the table. It’s driving me crazy!”
Mrs. Lindbergh: “Charles, can’t you do anything by yourself?”
Mrs. Washington: “George never did have a head for money.”
Mrs. Armstrong: “Neil has no more business taking flying lessons than the man on the moon.”
—Reader’s Digest

Men want to improve only the world, but mothers want to improve their whole family. That’s a much harder task.
—Harriet Freezer

No man is poor who has a godly mother.
—Abraham Lincoln

One godly mother is worth a hundred clergy.

My mother was one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen.
—Eleanor Roosevelt

Mothers Who Made History

The mother of George Washington taught her son the biblical ideals of political and social morality which Washington kept before the nation throughout his life. Family prayers were held twice a day with regular readings from the Scriptures.
The mother of Ferdinand Foch, the great general of World War II, taught him to put his faith in God and to pray. As a result his men said of him, “General Foch is a man of prayer, a prophet whom God inspires.” Throughout his life he continued the prayer habits he learned in his mother’s home.
James A. Garfield’s mother was an earnest Christian who taught her children that “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” A widow with four children, she not only managed her farm, but built with her own hands a log house which was also used as a church. There she taught her own children as well as others the Scriptures.
The mother of England’s famous William E. Gladstone led her son to faith in God when he was nine. He chose as his life’s motto: “In practice, the great thing is that the life of God may be the supreme habit of my soul.” He also wrote, “All I think, all I write, all I am is based on the divinity of Jesus Christ, the central hope of our poor wayward race.”
Oliver Cromwell’s mother taught him the simple truths of Scripture and he chose as his favorite verse, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”
The mother of Dwight L. Moody struggled against poverty on a New England farm. A widow with many problems, she taught her son the importance of eternal values. At seventeen, Moody accepted Christ and a few years later dedicated his life for service.
The mother of William Penn so impressed him with the importance of faith in Christ that he took as his life text, “This is the victory, even our faith which overcometh the world.”
Sir Isaac Newton’s mother prayed with and for her son every day of her life. It was the grief of her deathbed that she left a son of seven years at the mercy of a rough world. But Newton said, “I was born in a home of godliness and was dedicated to God in my infancy.”
—Harry Albus

Lunch-Box Recipe
An apple for his missing tooth!
A sandwich for his size!
And lettuce for his clear young skin;
A carrot for his eyes.
A meat to make him swagger,
And a sweet to make him sing …
A lunch box for a boy in school
Is not a simple thing.
So much of love and wisdom
Must be packed inside, unbidden—
The love completely visible,
The wisdom wisely hidden.
—Mary Elizabeth Counselman

The washer breaks, the stew gets burned,
And Junior catches cold;
Then Sister tears her brand new dress …
You try hard not to scold …
You head for bed to nurse your head,
And hope to leave it all,
And that’s the very time, of course,
The preacher seems to call!
The dinner’s late and Daddy shouts,
“Where did you hide my shirt?”
You cut your finger on a knife,
And boy, does it hurt!
At last you tumble into bed,
Your vision strangely blurred,
You lift your heart to heaven,
But you wonder if God heard.
Ah, God is in His heaven!
He saw what just transpired:
He placed another star upon
The crown that you inspired!
He knows your every heartache …
He sees your deep despair,
And in His way He keeps you,
And loves your every hair!
The woman is His buffet
For every wind that blows:
She has a special portion
Of His grace … and how it glows!
—Sarah Jane Tomlinson

I look at him and think of her;
So many years ago
She held him close, sang lullabies,
And rocked him to and fro.
Her loving prayers, her tenderness
Hopes, cares, and sacrifice
Produced a man who seems to be
All virtue and no vice.
One plainly sees her honesty
In his clear eyes of blue
Her sweetness is reflected in
His every action too.
In him she realized her dreams
Then gave him to another
Yes, I’m the lucky girl, and oh!
So grateful to his mother!

How to Bake a Cake
Light oven; get out utensils and ingredients. Remove blocks and toy autos from table. Grease pan, crack nuts.
Measure two cups of flour; remove Johnny’s hands from flour; wash flour off him. Remeasure flour.
Put flour, baking powder, and salt in sifter. Get dustpan and brush up pieces of bowl Johnny knocked on floor. Get another bowl. Answer doorbell.
Return to kitchen. Remove Johnny’s hands from bowl. Wash Johnny. Answer phone. Return. Remove one-fourth inch salt from greased pan. Look for Johnny. Grease another pan. Answer telephone.
Return to kitchen and find Johnny. Remove his hands from bowl. Take up greased pan and find layer of nutshell in it. Head for Johnny who flees, knocking bowl off table.
Wash kitchen floor, tables, walls, dishes. Call baker. Lie down.

A Mother’s Prayer
I wash the dirt from little feet, and as I wash, I pray, “Lord, keep them ever pure and true to walk the narrow way.”
I wash the dirt from little hands, and earnestly I ask, “Lord, may they ever yielded be to do the humblest task.”
I wash the dirt from little knees, and pray, “Lord, may they be the place where victories are won and orders sought from Thee.”
I scrub the clothes that soil so soon and pray, “Lord, may her dress throughout eternal ages be Thy robe of righteousness.”
E’er many hours shall pass, I know I’ll wash these hands again, and there’ll be dirt upon her dress before the day shall end. But as she journeys on through life and learns of pain and want, Lord keep her precious little heart cleansed from all sin and stain. For soap and water cannot reach where Thou alone canst see. Her hands and feet, these I can wash … But Lord, I trust her heart to Thee!

My mother was a saintly woman. I owe everything to her.
—Lyndon B. Johnson

Year after year my mother drove into us, “I expect you always to be first, not second, or third, but first.”
—Christian Barnard

My mother always seemed to me like a fairy princess: a radiant being possessed of limitless riches and power. She shone for me like the evening star. I loved her dearly.
—Winston Churchill

Not once can I recall from my earliest recollections hearing mother lift her voice in anger. She did not deliver lectures but guided us by her example. Mother gave balance to the home and led us into a rich spiritual life.
—Marian Anderson

When I was a child my mother said to me, “If you become a soldier, you’ll be a general. If you become a monk, you’ll end up as the Pope.” Instead I became a painter and wound up as Picasso.
—Pablo Picasso

In spite of the squalor in which we were forced to live, she kept Sidney (a brother) and me off the streets and made us feel we were not the ordinary product of poverty but unique and distinguished.
—Charlie Chaplin

MOTHERS-IN-LAW

What is the penalty for bigamy?
Two mothers-in-law.

When a man’s mother-in-law died, he was asked by the undertaker, “Do you want her cremated, buried, or embalmed?” He replied without hesitation, “All three. Don’t take any chances.”

MOTIVATION

Don’t drive your horse with the whip—use the oat bag.
—Russian proverb

There is only one way under high heaven to get anybody to do anything. Did you ever stop to think of that? Yes, just one way. And that is by making the other person want to do it.
—Dale Carnegie

Why, I wonder, don’t we use the same common sense when trying to change people that we use when trying to change dogs? Why don’t we use meat instead of a whip? Why don’t we use praise instead of condemnation? Let’s praise even the slightest improvement. That inspires the other fellow to keep on improving.
—Dale Carnegie

The greatest talent of all is the ability to get others to use their talents fully.

Seventy psychologists were asked, “What is the most essential thing for a supervisor to know about human nature?” Two-thirds said that motivation and an understanding of what makes people think, feel, and act as they do is uppermost.

Few leaders in history have been able to stimulate men to action as Napoleon could. The secret of his leadership was simple. He first determined what his men wanted most, then did all in his power to help them get it.

A coach is a man who is smart enough to get his team keyed up and dumb enough to think it makes a difference.
—Eugene McCarthy

MUSIC

“The sole purpose of all music is to bring praise to God,” Sebastian Bach said.
At the top of all his music he wrote the initials “J.J.,” which are the Latin abbreviations for “Jesus, help me,” and at the bottom of all his music he wrote the initials “SDG,” which stands for “Sola Dei Gloria” (“Only to God Be the Glory”).

He who despises music, as do all the fanatics, does not please me. Music is a gift of God, not a gift of men.… After theology, I accord to music the highest place and greatest honor.
—Martin Luther

Next to the Word of God music deserves the highest praise. The gift of language combined with the gift of song was given to man that he should proclaim the Word of God through music.
—Martin Luther

An old Jewish legend says that after God had created the world He called the angels to Himself and asked them what they thought of it. One of them said, “The only thing lacking is the sound of praise to the Creator.” So God created music, and it was heard in the whisper of the wind and in the song of the birds. He also gave man the gift of song.
—Our Daily Bread